Kung Pao Noodle (Lucky Peach 5)

Roy Choi

Soy Marinated Chicken Thighs

• 1/4 C soy sauce
• 1 T mirin
• 1 T rice vinegar
• 1/2 t sesame oil
• 1 T orange juice
• 2 dried arbol chiles
• 2 cloves garlic
• 2 scallions, chopped
• 1/2" piece peeled ginger chopped
• 1/2 onion, cut into 4 pieces
• 1/2 T kosher salt
• 4 boneless, skinless chicken thighs [I messed up and read this incorrectly but it's an easy fix]

I apologize for not taking a picture of the unblended ingredients, but I'm sure you get the idea.

Kung Pao Sauce

• 1 head garlic
• 1/3 cup chili-garlic sauce (or sambal)
• 3 T chili oil
• 1/3 C fish sauce
• 1/3 C rice wine vinegar [Couldn't locate this so I use a mixture of rice vinegar and rice wine]
• 1/3 C soy sauce
• 2 T sriracha [For whatever reason I didn't own sriracha yet.  Instead I used extra sambal.]
• 1/3 C minced lemongrass
• 1/3 cup kochukaru (Korean chili powder)
• 2/3 cup Thai basil leaves, loosely packed
• 2 t sugar
• 1 t sesame seeds, roasted
• 1 lime, juiced

Chop off the top 1/2" off a head of garlic.

Roast in foil at 400 degrees for 1/2 hour.

I bought like 20 stalks of lemongrass and proceeded to try to process them and was about to give up the ghost on this recipe when I didn't even get an 1/8 of a cup out of my efforts.

Some bitching on facebook led Jessica D to tell me that you can just buy this stuff at Asian supermarkets.  Jesus Christ.

This time I remember to take a photo.

The results.  I definitely didn't make a quart like the recipe suggested but just a little bit more than the actual recipe needed.  Afterwards I just sauteed just carrots, chicken tenders, and celery in it and ate it over rice.

The Rest

• 1 lb fresh Korean noodles (aka "Oriental Style noodle vermicelli") [Didn't feel like dragging myself to a Korean market and bought some relatively skinny Asian noodles that didn't need to be parboiled]
• 1 white onion, thinly sliced
• 1/2 C minced lemongrass (from the bulbous end of the pants, outer layers peeled away)
• 1 C scallions, thinly sliced [Didn't have these since the bunch had rotted by the time I made this]
• 1 bell pepper, sliced
• 1 C bok choy, spinach, or watercress, cut into 1/2" pieces
• 1 C eggplant, sliced into thin batons
• 1 C chopped tomato
• 1 C dried arbol chiles [After picking these and sichuan peppercorns out of my mouth all the time when making the Momofuku rice cakes some time ago, I thought "Screw this."]
• vegetable oil
• a fried egg for each serving
• water
• chopped cilantro
• Thai basil, picked and sliced [See scallions]
• fried shallots [Oh damn, I forgot to bust these out]
• sesame seeds
• roasted peanuts
• fresh Fresno chiles, julienned

The chicken thighs after I ripped the skin off.  Broil these for five minutes on each side or until slightly blackened.

Mise en place all lined up.  Actual cooking flies by in a New York minute.

First saute the onions, lemongrass, and scallions (if I had them).

A minute later, add the vegetables.

Add the sauce and toss to coat.  Then add the noodles and do the same thing.

Voila!  Cooking this dish didn't exactly make me a bigger fan of Kung Pao although the leftover sauce was pretty tasty when I utilized it otherwise.  I wonder if it would've been even more amazing if I had the right Korean noodles for the dish.
Even though the recipe involves about 40-something ingredients, the prep is exceedingly minimal.